bekah brunstetter
Bekah Brunstetter I care deeply. About a lot of things. Like really, really deep. Ow
playwright in brooklyn, NY

there is nothing like a dame

March 30th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

Earlier this week, I found myself getting my hair done next to a stunningly beautiful woman, like a woman beautiful not because of makeup, but because of inner life glow, alive eyes, white white teeth and voice like a British bell kept safe in a museum. She was trying decide which haircut to get, as she’d narrowed it to down to something like 6 different styles, and I said Well you could always grow five more heads and get all of them! And she threw her head back and laughed, so fully and deeply that I felt like I’d won a prize, and just for a second I think I became every man throughout history, in Rome and France and in every production of Guys and Dolls, who lived to make a beautiful woman laugh.

Posted in a lot, the whole world, tout, trying too hard, women, YAY | No Comments »

Have you been taking your Prenatal Vitamins

March 28th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

Kind, well, intentioned doctor: So, have you been taking your Prenatal Vitamins?

Me: Are you serious?

Doctor:….Yes?

(A TRAGIC, TRIUMPHANT SONG OF LES MISERABLES PROPORTIONS BEGINS. I stand on the table, wearing nothing but paper. I start to sing.)

Me:

YES

I HAVE BEEN TAKING THEM FOR YEARS

MADAM, I AM A PRENATAL VITAMIN

I BLEED FISH OIL AND FOLIC ACID!

MADAM, I TAKE THEM DAILY, BLINDLY, MERCILESSLY, 

SOMETIMES I JUST EAT THEM AS SNACKSSSSSSSS!!!!

(Calmly, I sit back down on the table.)

Doctor: Okay, well. Keep on taking them.

Me: WILL DO.

 

Posted in a lot, food, generally, ha, hmmmmm, the making of babies, whining, women | No Comments »

BOWELS OF THE DARK WEB

March 26th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

Last night, deep in the trashcan of the Internet, I stumbled across this heinous, vile (BEAUTIFUL) thing called Couples Acroyoga, in which COUPLES DO YOGA CRAZY YOGA POSES ON EACH OTHER AND ALSO KISS:

Do they like it? Or Is it forced? Does she say, hey Jason, let’s do the thing and he’s like ugh Melissa, right NOW? And she’s like JASON YOU PROMISED

Do they puke on each other before, after, during or all of it? ALSO, MOST IMPORTANTLY,  I WANT TO DO IT, HOW LONG UNTIL MORRISON AND I ARE CASUALLY DOING IT WHILE WATCHING TV

ALSO HOW DO YOU MEASURE TIME WHEN IT’S NEVER

Posted in a lot, hmmmmm, tout, trying too hard, Uncategorized, working, YAY | No Comments »

DREAM LIFE PARTNER

March 24th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

He’s currently looking at pictures of Star Jasmine to train and grow up our pergola, mumbling to himself, Star Jasmine is the shit.

Every now and then, and when I least expect it,  like perhaps just announcing that he’s going to go downstairs,  he starts doing very serious modern dance moves for no reason. They’re always gone as quickly as they started.

THIS IS HOW HE PUTS THE DUVET BACK INTO THE DUVET COVER.

REALLY ASKING, HOW DID I MANAGE TO PULL THIS OFF?

Posted in a lot, boys, i am lucky, love, MAWWAGE. | No Comments »

A Bird on the Hand

March 22nd, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

Yesterday, while surrounded by the comforts of the controlled environment in which I live, I found myself thinking about how rarely I step out of my comfort zone. MAYBE I take risks while writing? PERHAPS? But mostly I tend to make choices that keep me in situations in which unexpected things rarely happen, I have control over the variables of the environment, and I mostly interact with people who are like me. And I thought ,WHY, AS A WRITER, WOULD I EVER LIVE THIS WAY? Which is why, last night, over a controlled and comfortable dinner, Morrison and I signed up for a falconry class, because if A PEREGRINE FALCON (THE WORLD’S FASTEST ANIMAL) LANDING ON YOUR HAND IS NOT THE VERY DEFINITION OF STEPPING OUT OF ONE’S COMFORT ZONE THEN I TRULY DO NOT KNOW WHAT IS BUT YOU GUYS IT’S DEFINITELY NOT EXPERIMENTING WITH NEW WAYS TO EAT SWEET POTATOES OR READING BOOKS THAT SHOUT YOUR OWN BELIEFS BACK AT YOU.

Posted in a lot, ha, hmmmmm, i am lucky, i am scared, the whole world, things that I Have, tout, trying too hard, YAY | No Comments »

Sadie

March 20th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

Internets, meet my new niece! Sadie Madison Brunstetter, born two weeks ago to my bro Pete and his wife Mary! She entered the world with hair red like our paternal grandmother, Roberta, and INFINITE POWERS.

Upon her birth, I did what any normal, well adjusted aunt woman would do and SOBBED FOR THREE DAYS BECAUSE I ALWAYS IMAGINED MORRISON AND I MIGHT HAVE A DAUGHTER, BORN WITH HAIR RED LIKE MY PATERNAL GRANDMOTHER AND ALSO INFINITE POWERS, but now that those feelings have leveled, I can now look at pictures of her and just be squishy, and proud of my Brother, and Glad for Life.

Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments »

(MISSPELLED) CAKE POSTERS FOREVER

March 18th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

NO BUT REALLY DID YOU THINK I WAS DONE TALKING ABOUT CAKE? *NEVER NOT DONE / DRIVES TO DMV / CHANGES NAME TO CAKE*

The Cake is currently backpacking around America like a dang college drop out.  It’s currently in rehearsal in Fayetteville, NC,  Sarasota, Florida and Lake Dillon, Colorado.  I would like to please draw attention to Colorado’s phenomenal poster:

THE CAKE WAS DESTROYED / THE BRIDES WERE PLACED BACK ON TOP / WILL I EVER TIRE OF LOOKING AT POSTERS OF THIS PLAY / IS THIS A TIME LOOP / AM I ACTUALLY ALIVE / WHO IS BEKAH BRUNSETTER (?)

 

Posted in a lot, generally, ha, how interesting, i am lucky, the writing of drama plays, theater | No Comments »

SPRING INTO BUSINESS

March 16th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

If you and I have a Business Meeting at any point in the next four to five months, please know that I WILL be wearing this and only this uniform, which I assembled in a cold panic at Aritzia, fueled by a sudden and overwhelming need to dress like I have the Answers, or least like I have at least met one, once or twice.

 

Posted in a lot, what I'm wearing, YAY | No Comments »

I am Guilty Of

March 14th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

There’s a thing I do, as a contemporary robot person with robot computer phone brain and human heart, that I would like to stop doing. And so, like most things that I don’t enjoy about myself, I’ll lay it here, in hopes of embarrassing myself into Change.  Here it is: I make moral judgements on News Things before I’ve fully read about them. (It’s also a thing that we maybe all do, that maybe we should all stop doing.) I make these judgements quickly, based on a headline or a skim of an article that I cram into a tiny section of unoccupied time,  so I can participate in conversations and outrage and jokes,  so that I don’t feel left out, or alone. But WHAT IF INSTEAD, I waited until I’d thoroughly read up on the Thing,  before making my judgements, adding my commentary? Would I spend more time reading and informing myself, less time commenting? Isn’t my being informed on whatever the thing is more important that whatever commentary I might add which, especially if I’m not informed, is most likely not different from everyone else’s? And DID I JUST FIX THE WORLD?

 

Posted in a lot, arrogant art things, awesome, generally, hmmmmm, how interesting, i am a grown up, the whole world, words, worrying | No Comments »

SHELF LIFE

March 12th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

SEEKING RECCS FOR SUPPORT GROUPS FOR PPL WHO ARE WAITING FOR THE NEXT PART OF THEIR LIVES TO BEGIN AND SO ARE OBSESSED WITH THEIR OWN BATHROOM CORNER SHELVES

IF IT DOES NOT EXIST, WOULD SUGGEST THAT THIS GROUP BE FORMED IMMEDIATELY AND BE CALLED ‘TAKE CARE OF YOURSHELF’ OR “SHELF CARE”

Posted in a lot, ha, hmmmmm, things, things that I Have | No Comments »

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