bekah brunstetter
Bekah Brunstetter I care deeply. About a lot of things. Like really, really deep. Ow
playwright in brooklyn, NY

MODERN WIFE

July 28th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

  • Wakes up
  • Works out
  • Does some work
  • Goes to work
  • Does more work
  • Leaves work, gets in car
  • FRANTICALLY COVERS SELF WITH PERFUME SO THAT HUSBAND WILL THINK SHE SMELLS LIKE TINY DELICATE FLOWER WHEN SHE GETS HOME
  • Gets home, kisses husband
  • collapses on top of work, BUT SMELLS GREAT

Posted in a lot, ha, i am lucky, love, MAWWAGE., whining, women, YAY | No Comments »

40 years

July 1st, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

My parents got hitched forty years ago today. Not only have they remarkably stayed married the entire time, they have stayed kind, patient, loving, committed, and have only lit each other on fire ONCE. In honor of their love, here is a short but working list of marriage advice that I have learned by their example:

  • If your spouse really wants to eat a block of cheddar cheese and that sausage that comes in those gift baskets at Christmas time, just let them do it.
  • When the time comes that the spouse is of a certain age, and it is no longer good for the spouse to eat an entire block of cheddar cheese and that sausage that comes in gift baskets at Christmas, gently tell the spouse that maybe they should consider an alternative snack; spends hours slicing carrots and celery and googling low carb ranch dressing until you find things that your spouse might like to snack on, instead
  • when your spouse comes at you about your snack habits and you’ve had a long day at work and you JUST WOULD LIKE SOME CRACKERS AND CHEESE, take a deep breath, remember that she only wishes for you to be in the world as long as humanly possible
  • In the spirit of a lifelong quest to surprise and make each other happy, Acquire a puppy
  • Don’t be mad at each other when one decides that the puppy is too much to care for at this point in their life and wants to return said puppy, but instead, be patient when RETURNING THAT PUPPY
  • Be totally mellow and cool when your spouse gets a motorcycle and wants to ride around with you on it so he purchases for you a full body leather motorcycle riding outfit
  • try it on, ONCE
  • Say nothing but smile behind your eyes when gradually, he tires of motorcycle, gifts the motorcycle to your son
  • Bring home flowers, just because it’s Tuesday
  • Make fun of each other whenever possible
  • Kiss often
  •  Try not to light each other on fire

Posted in i am lucky, love, MAWWAGE. | No Comments »

the best of Boys

June 10th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

For girls with brothers, I think there is a special place in the heart that explodes when their love and their brother do literally anything together, like laugh together, or stand next to each other, or play a game with each other, or even stand next to each other while playing games. THIS PICTURE / MEMORY NOW LIVES IN THAT CORNER OF MY HEART.

 

Posted in boys, i am lucky, love, MAWWAGE., YAY | No Comments »

Celebs

May 9th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

There was a professional photographer present at my friend Stephen’s Cinco De Mayo party, and so naturally, he took a few candid shots of us, since we were Sitting and wearing Shirts.  Instead of selling them directly to People Magazine, I think I’ll just share them here, because I’m for the People.

SaveSave

Posted in a lot, famous people stuff, fancy, generally, ha, MAWWAGE., what my friends are doing | No Comments »

TOOT TOOT / JEEP JEEP

May 6th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Yes, this IS a picture of me with my new car (a Jeep Compass, so that I might feel like I still live in NC, because I big time associate Jeeps with the Thruway shopping center parking lot, drives to the mountains) but mostly it’s a shout out to all of the husbands out there who take 900 pictures of us and then when we don’t like them, take 900 more, and when we don’t like THOSE, they tell us to turn away, think of Farts, and look back at the Camera. WORKS EVERY TIME.

Posted in generally, ha, horn tooting, i am a grown up, MAWWAGE., things, things that I Have, where i want to live | No Comments »

how to paint a miniature

April 23rd, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Yesterday afternoon, Morrison painted a miniature while I tried to rewrite a tiny part of The Cake for the 900th time. Taking a break from  (READ: PROCRASTINATING) my own task at hand, I watched him swirl tiny paints together with a tiny brush and bring the tiny brush to the tiny face of a tiny person. It felt like he and I were attempting the exact same thing. And so, if it’s a writer’s job to collect similes: trying to rewrite a play that’s already existed for years, without breaking it or changing it entirely, is EXACTLY like painting the Hair onto a fingernail sized person: you must use the tiniest of brush strokes, you must never once question what it is that you are doing.

Posted in a lot, hmmmmm, MAWWAGE., whining, working | No Comments »

All I wanna do, is plate some food

March 27th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Sometimes (all of the time) (particularly when I’m on hiatus) there is nothing more satisfying than spending way too much time preparing and plating dinner, like even pulling out the fun plates and placemats and napkins from the wedding registry that you thought you’d never use, and then laying it all out and presenting it to your husband like a five year old who cleaned their room but really just put their pillow on their bed. I PRESENT TO YOU, almond crusted rainbow trout with sides of swiss chard and my deep need to be complimented!

Posted in a lot, food, generally, ha, how interesting, i am a grown up, i am lucky, MAWWAGE., trying too hard, working, YAY | No Comments »

a picture of a miracle

March 10th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

This weekend is tiny baby brother Tim’s bachelor party in Boston, and since I can’t be there (BUT REALLY, WHY WOULD I BE THERE) I asked other best man / bachelor party coordinator brother Dan if he might send me a picture for my blog. These are not dudes who take pictures, so the fact that I received this last night is NOTHING SHORT OF A MIRACLE.

I imagine it going something like this:

Dan:  (to bartender) Hey, could you take a picture of us real fast, my sister wants a picture of us, I don’t want a picture, it’s for my sister. (to group) Hey guys, this is stupid, but my sister wants a picture for her blog, everyone like, hold your whiskey and smile. (bartender takes picture) Awesome, that was stupid, that’s done, everyone be normal now. 

THANK YOU DAN FOR PUTTING YOURSELF OUT THERE FOR ME, AND HAPPY BACHELOR WEEKEND TIM!

 

 

Posted in boys, brothers, family, love, MAWWAGE. | No Comments »

EVERYDAY’S THE 14TH

February 14th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

My love for this fine person can be expressed solely with Outkast lyrics, baked goods, face-sized smiles, and occasionally my own words.

Posted in holidays, i am lucky, love, MAWWAGE. | No Comments »

MUFFIN SHAME

February 9th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

N. shame caused by the quality of one’s muffins

Earlier this week, I made a bunch of muffins because when I have the time, and even when I don’t, maybe I’m the kind of person who would like for her husband to ideally have a homemade baked good each day with his breakfast, and also because baking is the single most productive form of procrastination. I made said muffins, Vivian Howard’s Twin Muffins, a recipe she whipped up with squash and dried cherries and pecans and whole wheat flour, to trick her twins into eating things that are good for them. But I definitely underbaked them, so they are only like 70% as good they should be, and each day when I pass them, I feel a deep sense of a shame that can only be described as Muffin Shame, and if I can’t document that here then I genuinely do not know what this blog is for.

Posted in food, generally, ha, MAWWAGE., whining | No Comments »

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