bekah brunstetter
Bekah Brunstetter I care deeply. About a lot of things. Like really, really deep. Ow
playwright in brooklyn, NY

Validation

February 5th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

In this week’s New Yorker!


I wish I didn’t need it, but I do, so Big it’s Sad. I know I care too much about how I’m seen.  But it really only takes one subtle compliment,  like just a non-negative thing,  in a sea of ‘Brunstetter is annoying’ to make me think and feel, Onward!  There is something There. If nothing else, I have affection.

Posted in YAY, i am a grown up, the writing of drama plays, things that I Have, words | No Comments »

Order.

February 4th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

I was re-reading the Boxcar Children last night, like you do. I came across the part where the kids find the old broken dishes in the dump, take them home, clean them off, create a quick makeshift shelf in their boxcar, and arrange their new dishes on the shelf so that the boxcar might feel like home:

And it filled me with SUCH FEELING. I remember reading this part for the first time years and years ago. I remember how it made me long for a house with shelves that I could arrange things on. And I realize, that perhaps every time I can’t leave my house without making my bed or every time I put flowers on the table or stack dishes accordingly, and then do this psycho thing where I just kind of pause and look at the Order, appeased, I am living out this very boxcar children moment over and over.

Posted in a lot, books, generally, ha, hmmmmm, how interesting, i am a grown up, things that I Have | No Comments »

Kilroyaoke

January 15th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

The Kilroys went on a retreat this weekend to a giant golf resort / conference center in the City of Industry, which is an actual name of a place about 20 miles outside of LA. We picked it at random, but little did we know that it was the perfect place for gathering and scheming up plans for the coming years (hot tub / chocolate fountain / two weddings / one child’s math competition). What do thirteen lady theater nerds need nightly? A safe place to sing, by which I mean, a DEEPLY SERIOUS KARAOKE NIGHT HELD IN A CONFERENCE ROOM FEATURING PEOPLE IN THEIR 60S WITH STUNNING VOICES THAT CLEARLY COME TO THIS CONFERENCE ROOM EVERY WEEKEND TO BELT OUT UNCHAINED MELODY AND ALSO THE THEME TO LOVE BOAT. We sang not one, not two, but approximately thirty songs, a decent split between musical theater, Alanis, and completely unrecognizable but very personal numbers. We were at first met with trepidation, but eventually welcomed into the fold of regulars, until that time Sheila accidentally scratched one of them with her shoe while line dancing, at which point we could have been kicked out,  but then someone revealed we were TV writers, and suddenly, we were heroes, not activists, per se, just girls who used to sing in closets, and then cars, and now, in conference rooms. Also we made plans for the future. That, too. We need movements for gender parity now more than ever. STAY TUNED…..

Posted in YAY, a lot, generally, ha, i am a grown up, the writing of drama plays, theater, women, working | No Comments »

Meryl’s Apology

January 14th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

When Trump called Meryl ‘overrated,’ I just could not stop thinking about how insane that sentiment is, given her accomplishments, and so I wrote a thing about it. I’m a political satirist now OKAY BYYYYYEEEEEEE!

Meryl’s Apology

To: info at the Hollywood foreign press dot com.

Bcc: hellomeryl at aol dot com.

Subject: My Lifetime Achievement award dot dot dot.

To Whom it may Concern:

Meryl here.

First and foremost, I would like to thank you for the honor of the Cecile B. Demille Lifetime Achievement Award. I saw my acceptance speech as an opportunity to voice to what basically everyone has been thinking. Given what our country has endured over the last few months, it didn’t seem right to take that stage time to thank my mentors and children. I can send them emails and flowers give my children hugs and college tuition. They all know how I feel about them. I tell them daily. I also saw it as an opportunity to bring back bedazzling. Both, I thought, were effective. Until this morning.

This is awkward, but.

This morning I received word that I am ‘one of Hollywood’s most overrated actresses,’ which I first read as ‘Hollywood’s most overrated actress,’ but even though I’m just ‘one of,’ it still stings. I must say, I am deeply embarrassed. I think I can feel the very nudity of Eve. Here I was, parading myself around political fundraisers and charity events and cozy Italian restaurants and sometimes Nordstrom Rack thinking that I was, maybe, I’m embarrassed to admit – a woman of some talent. I’m not supposed to read my own reviews, but who truly does not? Show me an artist who does not secretly read their reviews alone in their bathtub and cry or scream or laugh quietly into the water and I’ll show you a liar. Or at least, an artist more self assured than myself. I once read someone describe me as the best actress of my generation, and I ashamed to admit that I believed it. And I have believed it for quite some time.

Until now. I feel an  – inadequacy. A lack thereof. I feel a 4 on a scale of 1 to 10, I feel certainly not hot. Blood coming out of my wherever. I suddenly hate my nose again and it’s been years since I put that to bed. I am a nasty, nasty mess.

And so, after some deep reflection, I have decided that I must humbly give back the Award. I hope you understand. The Lifetime Achievement Award should and must go to an actor who is under-rated, or at the very least regular rated. Not to me.

Sincerely, M.

PS. Just a heads up, I will be sending similar emails to the Emmys, the Oscars, and to The Screen Actor’s Guild, regarding all of those awards, too.

PPS. Oh and also BAFTA, Critics Choice, People’s choice, Cannes, AFI, Kids Choice awards, Elle women in Hollywood, The National Society of Film Critics, the British Independent Film awards, The Palm Spring International film festival. And my honorary Doctors of Arts degrees from both Princeton and Harvard. All going back via UPS mail.

PPS. Oh and the National Medal of Arts. I always forget about that one.  OH and the Presidential Medal of Freedom, too.  I am not worthy. I will have my hand prints paved over while I’m at it, too. All shall be righted; all shall be returned.

Posted in a lot, famous people stuff, fancy, how interesting, i am a grown up, politics | No Comments »

Baby’s first Meditation class!

January 13th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

After years of resistance, I finally gave in yesterday and tried my first meditation class. I’ve been resisting it because 1.) I do not like to sit still b.) I do not want to be a person who says things like, yesterday I tried my first meditation class. But while in Thailand and Hong Kong, I kept hearing about it and witnessing it, and then once home, my friend Alexis, who has a kindred spirit rapid fire brain, told me she’d started it and that it had completely changed her relationship to her own life — so I was like, FINE. Lord knows I can stand to quiet my head. It was a simple, intro, 30 minute class, and while the teacher kept telling us that we were trees (and also, I’ll admit, some pretty helpful stuff about what it is to be alive, the simplicity of that) I tried very, very hard to sit STILL, and to not judge my own thoughts, or the moments themselves. My thoughts were something like okay is it working I think maybe it’s working okay let me listen to what he’s saying and try and remember it wait what did he just say I already forgot I should really be writing this down okay maybe I’ll just breathe and pretend I am a tree did he say tree or maybe he said flower okay this is not working but I’m breathing and I think I’m still, am I still? Morrison would like this he would be so much better at this than me maybe I should bring him to a class we could do it together and maybe we could get tacos where are tacos what kind of tacos what kind of tortillas tacos hmmm I AM A TREE I AM A TREE. I’m going to take the fact that I basically sat still for 30 minutes as an accomplishment, and try a few more times. I think I see value in finding a way to transcend the whir of my thoughts, and just Be, not ten minutes ahead or two hours behind, just simply where I am, alive, and grateful for it.


Posted in LA angst, how interesting, i am a grown up, i am lucky, i am scared, i have peace, the whole world | No Comments »

PRESENTING

December 8th, 2016 by Bekah Brunstetter

WE GOT OUR WEDDING PICTURES! They are lovely. As hard as it is to look at 900 pictures of yourself  and marvel at how even in a stunning gown you can manage to look like an evil badger baby, I STILL love them. The moments are perfectly captured. We were so stupid happy that day and the pictures will forever show it. There are so many that I do not even know what to do with them. I think I will just stretch the process out, keep the feeling new and real, and just drop them like tiny love bombs whenever I feel like it. Starting with these! I present to you, the moment after Morrison and I first saw each other, hugged and cried, and then I promptly made him look at my butt, my exact words being, LOOK AT MY BUTT!

Posted in DRESSES!!!!!!!!!!!!, MAWWAGE., a lot, fancy, generally, ha, horn tooting, i am a grown up, i am lucky, life, love, memories, what I'm wearing | No Comments »

focus focus focus

December 7th, 2016 by Bekah Brunstetter

Morrison and I are off to Bali and Hong Kong next Friday for our HONEYMOOOOOOON! It does not feel real. We are doing WHAT? In typical myself fashion, I have been fretting about earthquakes (not unfounded, there was sadly a 6.5 in Aceh yesterday that claimed some lives) and tsunamis and turbulence and conversions and bugs and logistics instead of actually, you know, being excited for this incredible thing that we are so fortunate to get to go and do together, the beauty we are about to see. And so: I hereby reject my worry.  I will focus only visions of THIS SPA IN UBUD THAT IS ALSO AN ELEPHANT SANCTUARY SO YOU GO AND GET A MASSAGE AND WATCH THE ELEPHANTS JUST SORT OF HAPPILY WANDER ABOUT.

Posted in MAWWAGE., a lot, animals, awesome, how interesting, i am a grown up, i am lucky, life, love | No Comments »

WHY TO HAVE KIDS

December 5th, 2016 by Bekah Brunstetter

I mean I imagine life becomes richer / deeper / fuller and you grow in patience and selflessness but then also mostly you get to eat their fruit snacks. Weird that I already can’t wait for that?  Giant-femured Kid: Mom, where’d all the fruit snacks go? Me: MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.

Posted in Uncategorized, YAY, a lot, babies, fiction, ha, i am a grown up, things | No Comments »

tough job / someone must do it

December 3rd, 2016 by Bekah Brunstetter

Sheila: Hey, can I give you a few jobs for the Kilroys fundraiser?

Me: Sure thing, how can I help?

Sheila: Well first can you find somewhere that makes tiny cupcakes and –

Me: YES YES YES YES YES YES YES

Sheila:….and order fifty and bring them to –

Me: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Sheila:….the party?

Me: ALREADY DID IT, IT’S DONE

Posted in YAY, a lot, food, generally, ha, hmmmmm, horn tooting, how interesting, i am a grown up, wanting, what my friends are doing, women | No Comments »

on showing up

November 13th, 2016 by Bekah Brunstetter

Blaine and Carrie and I have been a trinity of friendship for something like 15 years now. We know each other’s souls and make each other laugh. All we used to do it sit around on various couches talkin’ smack about plays and Mr. Big. Now, all we ever want is just to have five minutes where we are all in the same place, on some couch.  As we keep getting older, it keeps getting harder to maintain the holy bond,  But we do our damnedest. Three different states, three different lives, three different schedules. In the last six months alone, we had Carrie’s Beyonce themed Beybe shower in NYC:

then my nuptials:

And yesterday, Blaine’s coed party that was maybe about the baby she’s bout to have but in no way was it a baby shower, not at all, more of a gathering with beer and mini ham biscuits for an inexplicit purpose:

I think the trick to maintaining old friendships well into adulthood is showing up. Sometimes you hop a plane, shuffle things around, max out credit cards, and you show up physically. Sometimes you can’t make that magic happen, so you just show up emotionally with a phone call. However you manage to do it: show up. Be there. With these gals (and their husbands and offsprings) I NEVER. EVER. REGRET IT.

Posted in a lot, babies, generally, i am a grown up, i am lucky, the future, the whole world, what my friends are doing, women | No Comments »

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