bekah brunstetter
Bekah Brunstetter I care deeply. About a lot of things. Like really, really deep. Ow
playwright in brooklyn, NY

Self Esteam

December 8th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Me, to Morrison: There’s some weird steam happening on the side of our house right now. Here’s a video.

Morrison: ….That’s steam. Steam happens when water evaporates. Like when it rains. The sun heats up the water, after….

Me: I mean, I KNOW, but it just seems like a lot of steam.

Morrison: I mean yeah, it is, but it rained a lot, and now it’s very sunny, so —

Me: SCIENCE

Morrison: Yep. Just basically that.

Me: I’M VERY SMART

Morrison: Yes, yes you are.

Me: AND VERY VERY BEAUTIFUL

Morrison: yes, sure —

Me: THE EARTH IS FLAT

Posted in a lot, generally, ha, hmmmmm, LA angst, MAWWAGE., silly, where i want to live, worrying, YAY | No Comments »

SOOTHING INDOOR PLANTS

June 7th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

  • purchases indoor plants to create a relaxing, soothing home environment
  • attempts to keep plants alive
  • PLANTS SHRVEL AND DIE
  • FILLS WITH THE RAGE AND ANXIETY THAT COME HOLDING HANDS WITH FAILURE AND WASTE OF MONEY
  • Goes outside, stands among plants in their natural place; feels better, sort of

Posted in life, silly, things that I Have, whining | No Comments »

re: Cats; Bags

May 21st, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Never, under any circumstances, should you let the Cat out of the Bag. Not even because you might spoil secrets, but because CATS STUCK IN BAGS, AND WATCHING CATS EXTRACT THEMSELVES FROM BAGS ONCE THEY’VE BECOME STUCK, IS QUITE POSSIBLY THE BEST THING IN THE WORLD AND ALSO WHY THEY INVENTED THE INTERNET.

Posted in a lot, animals, ha, silly, YAY | No Comments »

herstory

May 18th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Me, the other night:

  • Stands at bar waiting to be served
  • Notices that all of the dudes at the bar are straight up staring at her
  • Marvels at this, assumes that it must be the fact that she curled her hair. At first gets a little angry, like, just because she kinda looks like a Barbie, NOW she gets attention? But also, or mostly, she feels flattered, if not drop dead gorgeous; Muses over what a difference a little self care can make, you just have to —
  • Realizes there is a giant TV playing sports right behind her head

Posted in generally, ha, silly, women | No Comments »

good with kids

April 29th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Morrison is very, very, VERY good with kids, mostly because he takes them seriously and speaks to them like they’re adults, while at the same time, playing into their imaginations. With me,  it’s mostly awkward. (Me: HOW’S YOUR WEEKEND GOING? GET INTO ANY TROUBLE? DO YOU LIKE WINE? AM I TALKING LOUD?)  Yesterday, the school where Morrison TA’s had its (CHARMING; INCREDIBLE) spring carnival, and so naturally, we  played laser tag in a gym with a bunch of kids. At one point, I looked over and saw Morrison doing a slow motion death-roll on the ground while two little girls in pigtails stood over him, casually shooting him point blank. That fact on its own is NOT EVEN THE BEST PART OF THIS STORY.

Waiting in line to enter, we decided to form an alliance with four other kids. The plan was to hole up behind the big pile of Mats in the Northwest corner of the room. We got our guns, the room went dark, and we ran to our station. But as I lept behind mats next to Morrison, one kid looks at me skeptically.

Kid: Who’s that?

Morrison: It’s okay. She’s safe.

Me (to kid): I’m your wife!

The kid just looks at me.

Kid: Wait, what?

Me: Oh, wait, no, I meant —

Morrison: She’s MY wife.

Me: I’m HIS wife! Hahahaha! You don’t have a wife! That’d be weird. I promise I’m not your wife. Hahahahaha! I’m an adult!

Kid:…..okay……?

The kid returned to the game, only to turn on me ten minutes later, like this:

Kid: (innocently) How many lives do you have left?

Me: I’m not sure, how can I tell?

Kid: (brightly): Lemmee see your gun!

I hold it out to him, and he SHOOTS ME POINT BLANK.

Me: What the hell?!

Kid: (shrugging) ….friendly fire.

Me: HEY. THAT’S NO WAY TO TREAT YOUR WIFE.

 

 

 

 

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Posted in a lot, ha, how interesting, i am a grown up, kids, silly, tout, trying too hard, whining | No Comments »

TULUM!

April 26th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Elizabeth and I usually head to Palm Springs for our birthdays, for a weekend of sun and chips and giggling at each other, but this year, slightly on a whim, we’ve decided to go to Tulum, so that I might be on vacation literally until the moment that I go back to work (read: the very next morning.) DID WE GET SO EXCITED THAT WE BOOKED THE HOTEL SUPER QUICKLY BEFORE READING ALL OF THE REVIEWS, ONLY TO COME TO FIND THAT A GOOD 50% OF PEOPLE WHO STAY IN THE ‘RUSTIC CHIC’ ESTABLISHMENT HATE IT WITH A FIRE RESERVED ONLY FOR ONE STAR TRIP ADVISOR REVIEWS?

You KNOW it.

MIGHT OUR ‘PRIVATE PLUNGE POOL’ BE FULL OF SEAWEED AND BUGS? PERHAPS MAYBE. IF SUCH IS THE CASE, WILL I SPEND THE WEEKEND STILL COUNTING MY BLESSINGS THAT I GET TO GO AT ALL, AND BE WITH MY FRIEND, AND STARING AT THIS PICTURE OF WHAT IT’S SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE?

You know THAT, also.

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Posted in i am lucky, silly, vacay's, what my friends are doing, YAY | No Comments »

t’aint always easy

January 27th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Almost 14 years ago, I carefully glued all of my grad school rejection letters into a scrapbook, and amused myself by highlighting the word ‘regret’ in all of them. I think I sensed that someday, I might want to reflect back on them. My two favorites:

Reflection day is upon me. I am currently experiencing a lot of fortune with the Cake, like really more than a playwright could dream of or hope for (though honestly the bar is low, as having a play produced, in itself, is a miracle.) Meanwhile, I  somehow winded up working on a hit show that is managing to heal and to warm those that watch it (though, so did Switched at Birth, just on a smaller scale.) Reflecting on both of these career fortunes it’s easy to forget all of the Regret to inform You’s, but  I want to remember them and celebrate them, and I don’t know, maybe just a hair bit Gloat? So without further ado, I was rejected from: Columbia graduate Playwriting! NYU Graduate Playwriting! Yale Graduate Playwriting! Boston College MFA Playwriting! Post-grad school, I was rejected not once, not twice, but three times from Julliard, with nary even an interview, and I’ve been rejected by New Dramatists (an elite playwriting residency in NYC)  count ’em, 7 times! STILL STANDING, Y’ALL! WHAT DOESN’T ACCEPT US TO THEIR PROGRAM MAKES US WORK HARDER TO SHOW THEM WHAT.

Posted in a lot, how interesting, i am a grown up, i am lucky, life, narcissism, oh nooo, silly, the future, the writing of drama plays, trying too hard, TV, YAY | No Comments »

Dust

November 12th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

We can’t quite sleep in our new place yet, as it’s still quite covered in dust from the ongoing renovations, and I’m allergic to dust, so we gladly spent the night in a vaguely European hotel in Glendale where I’m pretty sure amateur porn producers house new girls when the fly in from Tampa. All of this to say, I am allergic to dust.  Reflecting on it now, is that not the lamest allergy there ever was? And isn’t EVERYONE allergic to dust? Isn’t it just like being allergic to clouds or periods at the end of sentences? I’ve known it since I went to the allergist when I was ten-ish and the doctor walked in on my putting my shirt back on. I learned three things that day: shame,  that my dust allergy was mild but persistent, and that I am BASICALLY THE MOST BASIC PERSON THAT HAS EVER LIVED.

Posted in memories, silly, whining, YAY | No Comments »

why things Are

November 1st, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

Driving to work this AM, waiting at a light, I remembered how when I was little, I wondered, or assumed, or even DECIDED that little people lived inside of the lights, and peered through the glass to see when cars were coming, and changed the lights accordingly. They only slept from 2-3 AM, in a tiny bed built into the roof, and when they were in bad moods, they would keep the light red for an extra two minutes. I miss when my brain used to wonder and decide things that were based in little to no logic. It’s not just that I’m not a kid anymore, it’s also that there is Internet, and within seconds, I can understand how a traffic light works. There are infinite answers, and so less wonder. But what if we decided to pretend to understand how things worked, instead of just looking the answer up, and knowing? WHAT IF INSTEAD GRASS WAS ANGELS’ EYELASHES AND CARS MOVE ONLY BECAUSE OF THE MILLIONS OF TINY DRAGONFLYS THAT LIVE INSIDE OF THEM?  I CAN’T WAIT TO LIE TO MY CHILDREN

Posted in a lot, hmmmmm, i am a grown up, silly | No Comments »

HALLOWEEN HEROES

October 29th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

Mo and I have been too busy throwing our life into boxes and making sure our new house has chairs to fully Halloween this year, so instead, I would like to highlight a few friends who have TRULY KILLED, I MEAN SKILLFULLY AND BEAUTIFULLY AND PERFECTLY MURDERED THEIR COSTUMES THIS YEAR.

Sheila and son Cal as Neo and Trinity from The Matrix:

Jason, Blaine, wee chicky Ruby and niece Laurel as Farm Folk:

And last but not least, the beautiful and sexual and currently romantically available Mack Yeager as Game of Thrones creator, George R.R. Martin:

I MEAN:

HERO

Posted in a lot, ha, holidays, life, silly, what my friends are doing, YAY | No Comments »

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