bekah brunstetter
Bekah Brunstetter I care deeply. About a lot of things. Like really, really deep. Ow
playwright in brooklyn, NY

SCENE FROM BEGUILING HOLLYWOOD LIFE

September 13th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Me, this morning,  frantically shouting at my agent’s assistant through my phonecar: HEY, SORRY, WHERE IS THIS MEETING?

Agent’s Assistant:…Joan’s on Third.

Me: YES I KNOW, BUT WHERE IS IT

Agent’s Assistant: on Third.

Me: BUT WHAT STREET?

Agent’s Assistant:…..On third.

Me: WHAT?

Agent’s Assistant: …Third Street.

(Beat.)

Me: OH RIGHT SORRY. I’VE HIT JUST A LITTLE BIT OF TRAFFIC JUST PLEASE JUST GIVE THEM A HEADS UP THAT I’LL BE SEVEN AND A HALF HOURS LATE. PLEASE APOLOGIZE FOR ME, AND HAVE THEM ORDER ME A DECAF ALMOND MILK LATTE, AND A SMALL CABIN TUCKED IN THE MOUNTAINS OF NORTH CAROLINA, PERHAPS BY A STREAM, WHERE I CAN LIVE OUT MY DAYS AND NEVER HAVE TO GET IN A CAR OR SPEAK ON A PHONECAR EVER, EVER AGAIN.

Agent’s Assistant: Will do?

Me: WAIT, WHICH THIRD

Posted in a lot, how interesting, i am a grown up, I write for television?, LA angst, whining, YAY | No Comments »

upfronts

May 15th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Allow me to be UPFRONT with you. For years, as a working TV writer, I heard the word upfronts in various sentences. i.e., I can’t that week, I’ll be at upfronts and they’re going to announce it at upfronts and we have to wait and see what happens at upfronts and I would nod and feign understanding and respond with things like oh, right, upfronts and even make my OWN sentences like, MAN, THOSE UPFRONTS! But I KNEW NOT WHAT I SAID. But this year, I can say this sentence with both confidence and understanding: The darling This is Us cast is currently at UPFRONTS by which I mean, the time when all of the people from all the shows go to NYC and present for advertisers so that the advertisers can say, you look like you could sell my deodorant! upfronts upfronts, and then everyone walks away with money (?)

Posted in a lot, famous people stuff, ha, hmmmmm, how interesting, i am a grown up, I write for television?, LA angst | No Comments »

horrible confession

March 18th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

As I prepare to leave for the airport, for what must be my 90th I STILL WRITE PLAYS! trip to NYC since I moved to LA six years ago, I feel compelled to share with you something I just remembered: early on in my LA days, when I took a shared ride /  super shuttle to the airport to save $, I ONCE ASKED A SUPER SHUTTLE DRIVER TO TURN AROUND AND TAKE ME BACK TO MY HOUSE BECAUSE I HAD FORGOTTEN MY MEDICATION BUT REALLY I HAD FORGOTTEN MY MAKEUP. THE SUPER SHUTTLE WAS FULL OF PEOPLE. I will spend the rest of my life making it up to People, just in general.

Posted in ....ew, a lot, generally, hmmmmm, LA angst | No Comments »

BYE SEASON 2

March 17th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

We officially ended the This is Us Season 2 (and some season 3) writer’s room last night with an adorable group outing to see my dear froworkers turned SHOW RUNNERS Isaac and Elizabeth’s movie, Love, Simon:  the first major studio teen love story movie to feature a gay protagonist (OUT THIS WEEKEND / GO SEE / IT WILL MAKE YOU GLAD TO BE A HUMAN.) Work can be hard and makes my brain hurt, but dangit, I do love each and every one of these people. SEE Y’ALL IN TWO MONTHS WHICH WILL FEEL LIKE TEN MINUTES!

SaveSave

SaveSave

Posted in a lot, i am lucky, I write for television?, I write for television?, I'M SO EXCITED, LA angst, life, what my friends are doing, working, YAY | No Comments »

How many am I?

February 1st, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Here’s a thing: it’s actually really quite often, while driving and passing an entrance to a carpool lane, I truly have this conversation with myself  in my head:

Self: Okay, so  I can use the carpool lane if there’s more than one person in the car. How many people are in the car?

Other Self: Just you.

Self: Okay so, how many people am I?

Other Self: Really?

Self: JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION THE ENTRANCE IS VERY SOON THIS IS OUR LAST CHANCE

Other Self:…One person. You are ONE person.

Self:…Right. (then) Then how is it that I’m having a conversation with myself?

Other Self: I DON’T KNOW, SWEETHEART, YOU TELL ME

Posted in generally, ha, hmmmmm, LA angst, whining | No Comments »

forget abrowt it

September 11th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

I have spent most of my life ignoring my eyebrows  like the two soft, pale Norwegian children’s beards that they naturally are. I spent none time or money ripping them out of my face, or  pouring hot stuff on them and THEN ripping them out of my face, and I never quite understood why friends spent so much time / money doing so. But then, a few years ago, I started to notice that I might kind of look better, or at least more elegant or Scarlett Johannason-er  or other things that living in LA makes you feel like you’re supposed to feel, if I shaped them sometimes, into pale but elegant children’s beards. And now, I’ve started dyeing them to match the hair on my head. That’s right. MY FACE HAIR HAS A STYLIST AND I LIKE IT.  JUST GO AHEAD AND TOSS ME IN A VAT OF KOMBUCHA AND QUICK DRYING NAIL POLISH TOP COAT AND COVER THE LID WITH LARA BARS AND THEN TOSS ALL OF THAT INTO THE OCEAN, THNKS.

Posted in ....ew, a lot, LA angst, vices, whining, women, YAY | No Comments »

Clutch.

September 5th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

I need a clutch for the Emmy’s, I mean, literally just a small purse to hold that I can put my phone in, that I might Clutch in a picture. I don’t where women find these, but I can’t seem to find a normal looking one, like just a small stupid black purse to put things inside of. I guess I have no choice but to go meta and clutch this hand clutch.

GO META OR GO HOME AMIRIGHT

Posted in ....ew, a lot, i am lucky, I write for television?, LA angst, things, things that I Have, wanting, what i am NOT wearing, what I'm wearing, whining, women | No Comments »

BLESSINGS ON BLESSINGS ON BLESSINGS

August 19th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

As if it wasn’t enough to get hired to write a movie with my gal Mamrie,  and then if it weren’t also enough that she happens to have just bought a house in Palm Springs and so we get to write said movie there, PRODUCTION COMPANY FUNDING SAID FILM SENT US A GIFT BASKET FILLED WITH WINE AND CARBS TO FUEL OUR WORK.

Being that were are Women who Live in LA and Make things, obviously we are both currently trying to NOT drink wine / eat carbs, and so we will be staring at the basket with gratitude and affection. In fact, I  just might cuddle the tiny log of beef with affection, gratitude.

Posted in a lot, i am lucky, LA angst, le film, whining, women, YAY | No Comments »

layers of Irony

May 2nd, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

While I’m an upstanding member of the Writer’s Guild, I can’t say for sure whether or not I actually know the definition of irony, but LET’S TRY and also WHO DOES?  For the past few months, especially weeks, there’s been a tonnage of anxiety about whether or not there would be a WGA strike come May 1st. In the weeks leading up to the potential strike, I found that I actually had no brain or emotional space to worry, as I was too busy re-writing a movie based on The Secret. I gave pretty much NONE mental energy to the strike, and in fact, I convinced myself it wouldn’t happen. CUT TO 1 AM LAST NIGHT, when the WGA negotiators reached a tentative agreement with the Producers. No Strike. DID I JUST IN FACT USE THE SECRET TO AVOID A POTENTIAL WRITER’S STRIKE WHILE WRITING THE SECRET?

Posted in a lot, hmmmmm, how interesting, i am a grown up, i am lucky, I write for television?, LA angst, words, working | No Comments »

STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE!

April 20th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

For the first time in my adult working life, I just voted to strike. Sometimes I forget that I’m in a guild, as I don’t feel like a laborer. Writers’ work happens mostly in our minds, but we still need a guild to protect us from tomfoolery, like, say, the fact that tv and film producers’ income has DOUBLED in the last eight years, while writer’s income has decreased by 30 percent. Our pension is suffering, we’re working for less money, and we’re expected to do it with gratitude that we are working at all. The problem with this is that writers are dreamers by nature, which is super easy to take advantage of. I’m still sort of shocked that I get paid at all to write, but I have to put that aside and stand up for fair pay — especially given the INSANE amount of money that is being made off of what we write.  And so, STRIKE! I’m choosing to hope that this is just a bargaining tool for the negotiators, but either way — see you on the picket lines, or back in the writer’s room with what we deserve (SNACKS) (AND HEALTHCARE)

Posted in a lot, factual smarts, generally, how interesting, i am a grown up, I hate money, LA angst, optimism, YAY | No Comments »

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