bekah brunstetter
Bekah Brunstetter I care deeply. About a lot of things. Like really, really deep. Ow
playwright in brooklyn, NY

Mirror, Mirror, on my Nails

May 20th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

WHO IS THE PERSON WHO WILL SPEND 50 DOLLARS ON A GEL MANICURE THAT MAKE HER NAILS LOOK LIKE MIRRORS?

WAIT…IT’S ME?

OKAY SO AT WHAT POINT EXACTLY DID I BECOME THIS PERSON?

IS IT POSSIBLE TO GO BACK IN TIME, RE-PRIORITIZE?

NO? YOU’RE NOT THAT KIND OF MIRROR? YOU ONLY ANSWER RHETORICAL QUESTIONS AND DO SPELLS? COOL COOL, AS YOU WERE

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I’M OFFRAID

May 5th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

As I’ve previously noted in this space, I like to discover things a year or two after every one has, so that I might burst into a room like, HAVE YOU GUYS TRIED AVOCADO ON TOAST?! IT IS LIT! Only to discover that everyone has been eating avocado toast and calling it Lit for at least five years. Most recently on this list of ‘discoveries:’ I’ve finally started watching the Handmaid’s Tale on Hulu. Honestly when it first came out, I watched the first few, and was unable to casually hang with genital mutilation on a school night. But I kept hearing how incredible it is, and so nevertheless she persisted, and I must say, it is stunning (and disturbing) and brilliant (and nightmare giving.) Now that I’m all caught up, I have to wait FIVE DAYS to see what will happen to dear Offred next. I’M SO OFFRAID FOR HER / AM I FIRST ONE TO SAY THIS? NO? WE’VE ALL BEEN SAYING THIS FOR TWO YEARS? WELL, HERE WE ARE AGAIN.

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Posted in the future, TV, women, words, worrying | No Comments »

how to water a plant

May 4th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

A few weeks ago, I dreamt that I thought I was a plant, like I kept going around telling people that I was one, and no one believed me. This is most likely related to the fact that we recently got some indoor plants, so that while we’re inside of the Box Man Made to keep us out of the Elements, we might still feel like the Elements are all around us. I’ve never been much of a Plant person (EXCEPT FOR IN MY DREAMS, WHEN I AM PLANT) and so all of the tricks to keeping it alive are completely new to me. I asked the garden center person how often to water the plant, and she all but laughed in my face. And then this:

There’s no such thing as a plant watering schedule. If it’s in direct light, give it water sometimes but not too often, only when it seems like it needs water. If it’s in indirect sunlight, also only sometimes give it water, less frequently than all the time, but just occasionally. If it’s not humid and the plant wants to be humid, spray it with water but only when it wants it. If it looks like it doesn’t want it, don’t do it. And ALWAYS FILTERED WATER.

Confusing, specific,  but also somehow vague. Perhaps I — AM PLANT?!

Posted in a lot, how interesting, i am a grown up, things, things that I Have, tout, trying too hard, whining, worrying, YAY | No Comments »

People, and how they do different Things

March 26th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Yesterday’s flight back from NC a.) had no internet or screens to speak of and b.) was TURBULENT AF and so I was forced to confront my (completely unfounded and odd) sometimes fear of TALKING TO THE PERSON NEXT TO ME. (What if you get trapped in the conversation? How does the conversation end? Neither of you can walk away. What if someone says something awkward and unfortunate and then you just had to sit their breathing each other’s air, passing each other’s trash to the flight attendant, stepping over each other and lightly grazing each other’s laptops with each others butts for the next 100 hours? WHAT IF YOU ARE BORING, OR THEY OR BORING, OR PROBABLY YOU ARE BOTH BORING?) But talk I did, and I’m glad I did.

Nice older man next to me: So, what do you do?

Me: I’m a writer.

Man: That’s cool, what kind?

Me: TV!

Man: THAT IS SO COOL!

Me: What about you?

Man: I’m an engineer, I fix programs and computer systems for Air Force planes.

Me: THAT IS SO EVEN COOLER!

Man: I think what YOU do is cool!

Me: NO, YOU!

Man: Whatever, YOU!

Me: WANNA BE INTERGENERATIONAL AND INTERDISCIPLINARY FRIENDS?

Man: I can’t right now, I’m stuck on a violently shaking plane

Me: WANNA SPEND THE NEXT FOUR HOURS PRETENDING LIKE THAT’S NOT HAPPENING?

Man: YES

Posted in the whole world, tout, trying too hard, TV, what my friends are doing, working, worrying, YAY | No Comments »

RARE OCCURENCE IN NATURE

March 25th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

College friends and soul sisters Blaine and Carrie and I barely get to see each other, especially now that I live on the other side of the country and they each had small humans exit their bodies recently. So being together in the same place requires great forethought and planning,  and whenever we manage to make it happen, we take so many pictures it’s like we’re members of a sacred endangered species, like we might soon disappear from the earth, which really, WE MIGHT, AND OTHER DARK THINGS YOU DISCUSS WITH YOUR FRIENDS WHEN YOU’RE 35 BECAUSE YOUR MORTALITY HAS NOW SETTLED AROUND YOU LIKE EVERY SPRAY FROM BATH AND BODY WORKS . We also discussed Pants. Lookit these beautiful Rhinos:

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Posted in a lot, babies, family, generally, hmmmmm, how interesting, i am a grown up, i am lucky, i am scared, the whole world, what my friends are doing, worrying, YAY | No Comments »

HUSKY GIRLS, THEY GET THE JOB DONE

February 24th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

My co-worker Vera just shared this will all of the lady This is Us writers. I HIGHLY RECOMMEND A THOROUGH READ.

HAHA IT’S SO FUNNY AND NONE OF IT IS REAL OR TRUE BUT ALSO NEVER RIDICULE A WOMAN, IT BREAKS HER SPIRIT AND CUTS OFF HER EFFICIENCY, NO REALLY I’M SERIOUS,  DON’T DO THIS

 

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Do

January 24th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

I’ve been quite under the weather the last few days, with really no option but to rest, and do nothing. I can barely use my brain, let alone move.  Turns out that this is my actual nightmare, as I spend an average day doing 900 things. I don’t feel like I’ve had a good day unless I’ve Done, and Done Lots. But it all feels like some sort of karmic lesson that I hope I can receive.  Isn’t that what you do with karmic lessons? Don’t you ‘receive’ them? Do you put them in a vase with water? It’s some sort of lesson in patience and being present and letting go of all standards and expectations and just Being. Off to find a large enough vase, so that at least one thing can be Done.

Posted in hmmmmm, how interesting, i am a grown up, working, worrying | No Comments »

PARADISE ALERT

January 13th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

While I am so sorry for everyone in Hawaii who rid the wave of this massively false alarm happened today, I’m just going to entertain myself the rest of the day by imagining people in bathing suits, lunging for pina coladas, crawling under patio furniture, careful so they don’t spill their drink.

Posted in a lot, the whole world, vacay's, worrying, YAY | No Comments »

BALANCE AND CALM

December 30th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

Today, on  Gifts, Morrison’s sister Anne kindly and knowingly passed on this magazine to me, which I carefully read on the plane ride home, but NOW I’M WORRIED I DIDN’T INTERNALIZE IT / WONDERING IF I SHOULD READ IT AGAIN AND TAKE NOTES / AM I CALM YET?! IS THIS CALM?! AHHHHHHHHHHHH *RUNS INTO WALL*

Posted in a lot, ha, worrying | No Comments »

The City Shoe!

December 20th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

Presenting the City Shoe! Like most shoes, it goes on your Feet! Perfect for both plane rides and hotel workouts!  Transitions seamlessly from Walking Around the City while Reflecting on how much your Life has Changed to Darting Away from those Feelings! Also great for various Ninja activities, running from Scenes of Crimes, Jaywalking, and fleeing Creative Insecurity! New, from Adidas!

Posted in the writing of drama plays, theater, what I'm wearing, worrying, YAY | No Comments »

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