bekah brunstetter
Bekah Brunstetter I care deeply. About a lot of things. Like really, really deep. Ow
playwright in brooklyn, NY

(MISSPELLED) CAKE POSTERS FOREVER

March 18th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

NO BUT REALLY DID YOU THINK I WAS DONE TALKING ABOUT CAKE? *NEVER NOT DONE / DRIVES TO DMV / CHANGES NAME TO CAKE*

The Cake is currently backpacking around America like a dang college drop out.  It’s currently in rehearsal in Fayetteville, NC,  Sarasota, Florida and Lake Dillon, Colorado.  I would like to please draw attention to Colorado’s phenomenal poster:

THE CAKE WAS DESTROYED / THE BRIDES WERE PLACED BACK ON TOP / WILL I EVER TIRE OF LOOKING AT POSTERS OF THIS PLAY / IS THIS A TIME LOOP / AM I ACTUALLY ALIVE / WHO IS BEKAH BRUNSETTER (?)

 

Posted in a lot, generally, ha, how interesting, i am lucky, the writing of drama plays, theater | No Comments »

I am Guilty Of

March 14th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

There’s a thing I do, as a contemporary robot person with robot computer phone brain and human heart, that I would like to stop doing. And so, like most things that I don’t enjoy about myself, I’ll lay it here, in hopes of embarrassing myself into Change.  Here it is: I make moral judgements on News Things before I’ve fully read about them. (It’s also a thing that we maybe all do, that maybe we should all stop doing.) I make these judgements quickly, based on a headline or a skim of an article that I cram into a tiny section of unoccupied time,  so I can participate in conversations and outrage and jokes,  so that I don’t feel left out, or alone. But WHAT IF INSTEAD, I waited until I’d thoroughly read up on the Thing,  before making my judgements, adding my commentary? Would I spend more time reading and informing myself, less time commenting? Isn’t my being informed on whatever the thing is more important that whatever commentary I might add which, especially if I’m not informed, is most likely not different from everyone else’s? And DID I JUST FIX THE WORLD?

 

Posted in a lot, arrogant art things, awesome, generally, hmmmmm, how interesting, i am a grown up, the whole world, words, worrying | No Comments »

VERY SUBTLE, GOD

March 10th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

Last night I found myself in a not unfamiliar and very overdramatic place, a place I like to hang out in basically after each of my plays debuts in New York —   spiraling about my ability to write, wondering if I would ever do it again. I decided to look for more bad Cake reviews, searching for confirmation that I am, in fact, a shallow hack that should go crawl under a couch and or / go back to customer service. AND WHAT, YOU ASK,  DID I FIND? I suddenly have a  Wikipedia Page . A long and thorough wikipedia page, with  a section for Early Works. A page that includes not one but quotes from ALL of my bad Times reviews, but still, a page that steps through my whole career thus far, from overwritten one acts in festivals to TV awards nominations, my marriage to actor Morrison Keddie (my favorite part.) And I remembered that every time I feel for the tiniest of moments that I can’t do it anymore, that it’s all been a lie, that I am the empress really wearing no clothes at all — I get some little sign to keep going. The timing is always so sharp, it always feels as if I’ve written it. HI, SIGN. THANKS FOR THE NUDGE.

Posted in a lot, generally, ha, hmmmmm, the future, the writing of drama plays, theater, trying too hard, wanting, whining, YAY | No Comments »

flu thought

March 2nd, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

  • Takes hot bath to relieve flu symptoms
  • accidentally stays in hot bath for like a very very long time
  • once out of bath, decides to check temperature to see if it’s still going down
  • SEES THAT TEMPERATURE HAS GONE UP
  • CONVINCES SELF THAT IT’S NOT FLU, IT’S DEATH
  • GOOGLES DEATH
  • REMEMBERS THAT WE JUST SPENT THE LAST 45 MINUTES SUBMERGED IN HOT WATER
  • WONDERS WHY WE ARE SUDDENLY REFERRING TO SELF AS WE
  • FALLS BACK ASLEEP

Posted in a lot, generally, ha, whining | No Comments »

I don’t know why or when

February 24th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

I found this picture amongst my things, and I’m not totally sure Why or When it was:

But given my tanned legs / popped hip, I think I can surmise that it was taken at Weight Loss Camp, ie that one Summer that I wore Confidence around like a bikini (and a bikini, I also wore an actual bikini /  for gruesome details please see my play  Fat Kids on Fire) but most importantly, I need to know WHERE AND HOW AND WHEN I PROCURED SILK BOXERS WITH FRUIT ALL OVER THEM,

And if I was in fact wearing them at Fat Camp, WAS the irony of the fact that I was wearing shorts with food on them lost on me? PLEASE LET IT NOT HAVE BEEN LOST ON ME.

Posted in generally, ha, hmmmmm, how interesting, i am a grown up, memories, what I'm wearing | No Comments »

Weather or Not

February 22nd, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

I didn’t see it, as I was eastside pretty much all day, but apparently yesterday it SNOWED IN LOS ANGELES. Meanwhile, in my humble part of it, Eagle Rock, I shivered as the sun went Down, Earth became Mars, I wondered where I Was, and where I was Not.

Posted in a lot, generally, hmmmmm, where i want to live | No Comments »

Beverly, Forever

February 18th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

As I relish / writhe in this life phase I’ll call ‘pre-kid aware,’ in which I don’t have kids yet but want them, and so think of all life things in terms of having or not having kids — one of the thing that’s struck me is that once I create a kid, I create a Person separate from myself, who then grows and forgets me, for at least a little while. That’s one of the great big sad and strange things about being a human — you have your own brain and your own will that sometimes carries you away from the people that made you. But somehow, on my Mom’s side of the family, our matriarch Beverly has stayed a focal point if not GODDESS for all of her granddaughters, no matter where we are at in our lives. And so, when we were asked if we could make it to Maryland to surprise our Grandma for her 90th birthday, naturally we all said yes, and the result was THIS FACE, WHICH WAS WORTH A THOUSAND PLANE TICKETS, WHICH WAS THANKFULLY NOT ACCOMPANIED BY A HEART ATTACK:

Literally every granddaughter, daughter, and daughter in law made her way to Beverly’s surprise tea, except for two who are out of the country. She cried, we cried, we heard stories from church friends about how she could talk to a lamppost, how she opened her house to everyone and anyone, then we all went to said house, gathered around her like she was a Queen and listened to her regale her tales from a life as a young Flight Attendant, when we were all just dust.

I marveled at the individual attention she always gave and continues to give to each of us.  I think that’s her greatest trick, her greatest gift. I know I’ve made hundreds of grandchildren, Bekah, but right now, it’s just you and me. 

Beverly, Forever.

 

 

Posted in a lot, family, generally, i am lucky, the future, the whole world | No Comments »

WISDOM; CONTROL

February 9th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

Find someone who loves you as much as this Pigeon and I love Goldfish Crackers

LIKE SO MUCH THAT WE CAN ONLY TAKE THEM IN DOSES / WE KNOW IT’S A SLIPPERY SLOPE FOR US SO WE DO OUR BEST TO BE MINDFUL AND GRATEFUL WHEN AROUND THEM AND RESPECT THEIR PRIVACY AND SPACE

Posted in a lot, food, generally, ha, hmmmmm | No Comments »

give none trucks

February 7th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

The scene: an olderish, corporate-y guy and I stand pissy in the LA rain outside an Enterprise rent-a-car. We both need rentals because our Cars are in the shop, mine because my Car is having trouble being Phone, and what good to me is Car if it is not also Phone?!

Kind Enterprise Guy who is very much just trying to get through his Day, with a brightness covering a deep shame: Okay, so! Unfortunately, all we have right now is Minivans.

Corporate guy and I exchange a quick, telepathic look, communicating one thing: DISPROPORTIONATE HORROR AND DISGUST.

Me: Are you sure you don’t have anything else?

Enterprise Guy: I’m sorry, no —

Me: I mean, anything, do you have like a truck?

Enterprise Guy: No —

Me: A bike? Some rollerbades? A large banana?

Enterprise Guy: No. I’m sorry.

Me: Because I would rather drive a large banana than that Van.

Enterprise Guy: we really, um. Don’t have anything else.

The Corporate Guy and I both release sighs so big, the Enterprise Guy has to take two small steps back. 

Me: Okay, then. Thank you, but I’ll just walk to Santa Monica. And when my feet get tired, I’ll just walk on my hands until my hands become feet. I WILL LITERALLY DO ANYTHING TO NOT DRIVE THAT MINIVAN.

Corporate Guy: WHAT SHE SAID.

Corporate Guy and I set off on foot. 

Corporate Guy: Are we ridic-

Me: YES, BUT WITH PRIDE. CARE TO WALK WITH ME THIRTY MILES TO THE OCEAN?

 

Posted in a lot, generally, ha, hmmmmm, how interesting, LA angst | No Comments »

THE LIFE CHANGING MAGIC OF KIDNAPPING

January 19th, 2019 by Bekah Brunstetter

Marie Kondo: okay, Bekah. I want you to take all of your clothes out of your closets and drawers, pile them onto your bed. Next, take each piece one by one. If it sparks joy for you, keep it. If it does not, thank it for being in your life, then put it in a pile to donate.

Me: Okay!

Marie Kondo:…Why do you have my children?

Me: HMM? OH. They spark joy for me.

Marie Kondo: My children are not your clothes.

Me: BUT THEIR CHEEKS AND TINY DRESSES

Marie Kondo: Please give me my children back?

Me: (as I run away carrying them)  SORRY, NOTHING ELSE SPARKS THIS MUCH JOY, I HAVE TO GO TUCK THEM NEATLY INTO A DRAWER, BYYEEEEEE

 

 

 

Posted in a lot, famous people stuff, generally, ha, hmmmmm, Uncategorized | No Comments »

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