bekah brunstetter
Bekah Brunstetter I care deeply. About a lot of things. Like really, really deep. Ow
playwright in brooklyn, NY

40 years

July 1st, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

My parents got hitched forty years ago today. Not only have they remarkably stayed married the entire time, they have stayed kind, patient, loving, committed, and have only lit each other on fire ONCE. In honor of their love, here is a short but working list of marriage advice that I have learned by their example:

  • If your spouse really wants to eat a block of cheddar cheese and that sausage that comes in those gift baskets at Christmas time, just let them do it.
  • When the time comes that the spouse is of a certain age, and it is no longer good for the spouse to eat an entire block of cheddar cheese and that sausage that comes in gift baskets at Christmas, gently tell the spouse that maybe they should consider an alternative snack; spends hours slicing carrots and celery and googling low carb ranch dressing until you find things that your spouse might like to snack on, instead
  • when your spouse comes at you about your snack habits and you’ve had a long day at work and you JUST WOULD LIKE SOME CRACKERS AND CHEESE, take a deep breath, remember that she only wishes for you to be in the world as long as humanly possible
  • In the spirit of a lifelong quest to surprise and make each other happy, Acquire a puppy
  • Don’t be mad at each other when one decides that the puppy is too much to care for at this point in their life and wants to return said puppy, but instead, be patient when RETURNING THAT PUPPY
  • Be totally mellow and cool when your spouse gets a motorcycle and wants to ride around with you on it so he purchases for you a full body leather motorcycle riding outfit
  • try it on, ONCE
  • Say nothing but smile behind your eyes when gradually, he tires of motorcycle, gifts the motorcycle to your son
  • Bring home flowers, just because it’s Tuesday
  • Make fun of each other whenever possible
  • Kiss often
  •  Try not to light each other on fire

Posted in i am lucky, love, MAWWAGE. | No Comments »

the best of Boys

June 10th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

For girls with brothers, I think there is a special place in the heart that explodes when their love and their brother do literally anything together, like laugh together, or stand next to each other, or play a game with each other, or even stand next to each other while playing games. THIS PICTURE / MEMORY NOW LIVES IN THAT CORNER OF MY HEART.


Posted in boys, i am lucky, love, MAWWAGE., YAY | No Comments »

The Roast

May 31st, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Today is Julien’s birthday, and so some friends in Winston are gathering to Roast her. Hoping to participate remotely,  I tried to come up with a list of solid burns to text her. The result: IT’S SO ANNOYING HOW LOYAL SHE IS and SHE’S THE WORST WITH HOW SHE’S ALWAYS KEEPING UP WITH YOUR LIFE AND CHECKING IN ALL THE TIME and I HATE HOW MUCH SHE SENDS ME A BOX OF MACADAMIA NUT MILK BECAUSE OF THAT TIME I SAID I LIKE MACADAMIAS and HER HAIR IS SO PRETTY AND FLUFFY AND SOMETIMES WHEN YOU WALK BY HER, HER BIG FLUFFY HAIR TOUCHES YOUR FACE and SHE LOVES TO CLIMB ROCKS AND SO SOMETIMES, DAMN HER, YOU END UP IN BEAUTIFUL PLACES ALWAYS CLIMBING ROCKS. BURN! In summation, I just don’t think that roasting friends is my scene. I think I’ll stick to roasting Broccoli and complete strangers wearing pants that don’t fit.


Posted in generally, love, what my friends are doing, women, words, YAY | No Comments »

Mrs. Elli May

May 28th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

My dear cousin Elli was married yesterday, in a beautiful ceremony featuring vintage cars, all of her eight sisters shaking their butts in unison for eternity and happy, happy tears. This bride began her night on the dance floor and did not leave it for five hours. Like, I’m genuinely not even sure if she went to pee.

Elli is not just any Elli.  Elli is the oldest of eleven children, with eight sisters. Here they all are, shaking what their mother gave them:

And here’s the whole Bray fam / with siblings and spouses:

As her oldest sis Epiphany lovingly put it in her toast, Elli was born to lead and care for others, which  she now does as an FBI AGENT WHICH I TELL PEOPLE AS OFTEN AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE BECAUSE COULD A COUSIN BE MORE HUMBLED BY OR PROUD OF ANOTHER COUSIN? JUDGING MY EXPRESSION HERE, I DOUBT NOT.

Elli’s was the first of their grandchildren’s weddings that our grandparents had to miss, as my Grandpa is too far gone into Alzheimer’s to travel, and my Grandma can’t leave him. But I assisted by cousin Ella, I Facetimed my Grandma into the ceremony so she could sort of be there. And as I watched her face as she watched Elli wed, I was overwhelmed by the years she’s lived, the things she’s seen, the People she’s helped make, by the fact that Elli and I are two of those people, that we are alive at all, that we have not only the present but also our memories, and even if our memories fade, there are the people around us to be living reminders of all that once was, and will Be.


Posted in a lot, i am a grown up, love, women, YAY | No Comments »

62 years young

March 22nd, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

The happiest of birfdays to my Mama, who just a few weekends ago, in a 48 hour visit, played yard games, SKIPPED ROPE and did an Irish Car Bomb all while remaining classy, virtuous, kind as pack a monks, aspirational and GOSHDARN ADERABLE. Love you ma!

Posted in family, i am lucky, life, love, YAY | No Comments »


March 11th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Facial giving person (technical term?): Aw, You guys look like sisters! 

Later, my Mom snickers.

Me: What?

Mom: Sorry!

Me: For what?

Mom: That’s an insult for you, and a compliment for me! 


Posted in a lot, family, ha, love, women, YAY | No Comments »

a picture of a miracle

March 10th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

This weekend is tiny baby brother Tim’s bachelor party in Boston, and since I can’t be there (BUT REALLY, WHY WOULD I BE THERE) I asked other best man / bachelor party coordinator brother Dan if he might send me a picture for my blog. These are not dudes who take pictures, so the fact that I received this last night is NOTHING SHORT OF A MIRACLE.

I imagine it going something like this:

Dan:  (to bartender) Hey, could you take a picture of us real fast, my sister wants a picture of us, I don’t want a picture, it’s for my sister. (to group) Hey guys, this is stupid, but my sister wants a picture for her blog, everyone like, hold your whiskey and smile. (bartender takes picture) Awesome, that was stupid, that’s done, everyone be normal now. 




Posted in boys, brothers, family, love, MAWWAGE. | No Comments »


February 26th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter


Happy first birthday to this blessed flower, my sweet niece and soon to be confidante (like as soon as she speaks words) Miss Olivia Grace.

Posted in DRESSES!!!!!!!!!!!!, family, love, women | No Comments »


February 20th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

Say,  do you like it when your heart is as warm and soft as a snickerdoodle just out of the oven? ME TOO. This beautiful and charming Pixar/Disney movie about the  Day of the Dead is now out on iTunes,  and last night we watched it like children and said things like WHOAAAAA! and then cried like adults with expanding souls. It’s just stunning. WATCH IT TONIGHT I AM A COMMERCIAL.

Posted in le film, life, love | No Comments »

clothes as memory

February 16th, 2018 by Bekah Brunstetter

I dressed myself this morning, like you do, and as I drove to work, I reflected on the layers that  I had decided to put on myself, both literally and figuratively. I’m sporting a jacket I got at a vintage store 10 years ago in Boston, to wear to a wedding I was attending with my boyfriend at the time who would ultimately not be my husband, at a time when the idea of my actual self getting married felt so foreign to me that weddings just felt like long parties with slightly better clothes. Under this jacket, I’m wearing the flannel of Morrison and I’s  wedding colors that I got to wear to our welcome dinner the night before we wed. If I sniff it really deep, I can still smell the campfire. Food as memory, clothes as memory, memory as memory, amiright?

Posted in i am lucky, life, love, what I'm wearing | No Comments »

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