bekah brunstetter
Bekah Brunstetter I care deeply. About a lot of things. Like really, really deep. Ow
playwright in brooklyn, NY

EYE’M MAD

May 25th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

DEAR WOMEN WHO CAN SEE:

DON’T WEAR GLASSES THAT YOU DON’T ACTUALLY NEED TO SEE JUST BECAUSE THEY LOOK COOL. IT IS INSULTING TO PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY NEED GLASSES, LIKE TO SEE, WHICH IS THE POINT OF GLASSES. IT’S LIKE DECIDING TO ROCK A WHEELCHAIR EVEN THOUGH YOU DON’T NEED IT TO WALK JUST BECAUSE IT MATCHES YOUR NEW FUN HIGH TOPS. VISUAL IMPAIRMENT IS AN ACTUAL THING.

SINCERELY,

OTHERWISE COMPLETELY ABLE BODIED PERSON WITH BAD EYES

Posted in what I'm wearing, what i am NOT wearing, whining, women, words | No Comments »

you wear what you eat

May 24th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

Sometimes, purely for my own glee and relaxation,  I google a random thing and Dress and just look at the pictures. Bacon dress. Car dress. Infinity dress. Question dress. Today: Salad dress:

VOW RENEWAL ANYONE? ANYONE? NO? K I’LL JUST BE OVER HERE EATING MY BRA

Posted in DRESSES!!!!!!!!!!!!, a lot, hmmmmm, wanting, what I'm wearing, what i am NOT wearing | No Comments »

the capsule wardrobe

May 18th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

Yesterday, I capsuled my wardrobe, which is a thing that women are now doing to their clothes. Women with arguably excess income (me) tend to sometimes (everyday) fill some unnamable void they feel with a new clothing item that they will probably never wear, or only wear once and feel dissatisfied because, in fact, sweaters do not solve larger existential problems, unless it’s a really good cashmere. Not only is the underlying emotional issue behind the purchase not addressed, it is a horrible waste of money and time that gives me great anxiety when I really think about it. Enter the capsule wardrobe, in which you basically get rid of most of your clothes and limit yourself to about 40 items that you really love to wear, that are made well, or madewell, that you feel good while wearing, and you just wear those things, which is to say, HOW MEN ALREADY TREAT THEIR CLOTHES. Getting rid of stuff felt liberating, empowering, and definitely only happened immediately after I dropped 200 bucks on new clothes that I decided were the only clothes I ever needed to wear. I AM FREE!

Posted in YAY, a lot, wanting, what I'm wearing, what i am NOT wearing, what my friends are doing, women, worrying | No Comments »

creatures

May 13th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

A massive sea creature that is maybe a squid or a whale or some new sort of thing just washed ashore in Indonesia. Among  questions like WHAT and WHY, I am pondering this: isn’t it crazy that some creatures on earth look like this:

and others, this?

And then even others, this?

Posted in Uncategorized, a lot, animals, ha, hmmmmm, the whole world, what I'm wearing, what i am NOT wearing | No Comments »

why I need a uniform

May 5th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

Sometimes, or, if I’m being honest, ALL OF THE TIME, I spend more time than I should thinking about what I should wear to a thing. I place a lot of value on outside appearances and neglect the interior. It trickles down even to my idea of what clean is. If a kitchen LOOKS clean, it is clean. No dishes in the sink but like quiet, secret pools of old chicken juice pushed under the dishwasher. A while back, I found this letter in a box of things at my parents’ house. I wrote it to Seventeen Magazine when I was 13 or so, for a ‘tell us why you need a Makeover’ type contest.

It is so sad and horrifying that I guess it’s also a little bit funny, but I keep it a picture of it saved on my desktop to remind myself that there’s some part of me that, for whatever reason, was trapped in this shallow loop at a young age, and that now I am an adult, and I can step out of this loop and just be a person who just wears the same thing every day, a uniform over her thoughts.

Posted in ....ew, a lot, silly, vices, wanting, what I'm wearing, what i am NOT wearing, whining, women | No Comments »

IT’S NOT REAL

September 8th, 2016 by Bekah Brunstetter

After trying numerous (albeit drug store) brands of lipstick / stain, I am convinced that there is no such thing as a lipstick that does NOT make you look like you literally ate a bunch of lipsticks for lunch, then took all of the lipstick crumbs that fell out of your mouth and then rubbed those around your mouth and onto your teeth. I must conclude that when you see a woman with nice looking lipstick that is only on her lips, she has actually just implanted a device in every single other person’s eyes that projects digital color onto the lip part of her face, because there is LITERALLY NO OTHER EXPLANATION.

Posted in ....ew, a lot, trying too hard, wanting, what I'm wearing, what i am NOT wearing, whining, women, worrying | No Comments »

HOT (GROSS)

August 22nd, 2016 by Bekah Brunstetter

LOOK AT MY BODY

IT’S GOT CURVES AND NOT CURVES IN ALL THE RIGHT PLACES

ALSO IT’S GOT MY INTESTINES INSIDE OF IT

Posted in ....ew, YAY, what i am NOT wearing, women | No Comments »

fun things to do with $1290

August 15th, 2016 by Bekah Brunstetter

- Pay your rent

- Fly to europe and back

- turn it into pennies and fill a kiddie pool and duck tales your way through it every morning before work

- PURCHASE THESE WORST SHOES EVER FOUND ON THE INTERNET, THE ‘GUCCI ZEBRA PUMP’

- Find the person who invented a shoe with hair coming out the back of it / have them shipped off to space

Posted in a lot, i am scared, what i am NOT wearing | No Comments »

on selecting a wedding band

June 1st, 2016 by Bekah Brunstetter

Start simply, with your basic preferences. Gold or silver? Thin or thick? Diamonds or solid band? Lastly, what compliments your engagement ring, if you plan to wear it every day? Once you have narrowed it down, FIND EVERY RING THAT FITS THE PARAMETERS AND PURCHASE EVERY SINGLE ONE AND STACK THEM ON YOUR WEDDING FINGER UNTIL IT CAN NO LONGER BEND. ONCE THAT FINGER IS FULL, MOVE ONTO OTHER FINGERS. WHEN YOU ARE OUT OF FINGERS, GROW ANOTHER HAND.  WEAR ALL OF THE BEAUTIFUL RINGS BECAUSE HOW CAN ONE BE EXPECTED TO SELECT ONLY ONE RING, I MEAN I SELECTED ONE MAN FROM THE UNIVERSE TO BE MY HUSBAND, IS THAT NOT ENOUGH? MUST I REALLY KEEP DECIDING THINGS?!

Posted in MAWWAGE., ha, hmmmmm, love, what I'm wearing, what i am NOT wearing | No Comments »

Occasionally

May 8th, 2016 by Bekah Brunstetter

Sometimes, one must exchange one’s usual world and routine for a blue wig and spend the day frolicking around Ru Paul’s Drag Con, putting glitter all over your face, chasing around a particular queen for a picture because she bears an uncanny resemblance to your ex-boyfriend.

Posted in YAY, a lot, awesome, boys, ha, hmmmmm, life, running, silly, what I'm wearing, what i am NOT wearing, women | No Comments »

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