bekah brunstetter
Bekah Brunstetter I care deeply. About a lot of things. Like really, really deep. Ow
playwright in brooklyn, NY

house for sale in Los Angeles

June 15th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

Newly tilted over, falling into the ocean 3 bed / 1.75 bath house for sale in sort of Los Angeles by which I mean, within one hour drive! It’s listed as approximately 10 times your yearly income regardless of how hard you’ve been working since grad school! It has a Countertop (1), .5 Toilet, Room, Floors, Walls (sometimes), and Beautiful views of the ocean, as it is partially sliding into it! Act now, as there are already 47 offers, all of which have been made in Diamonds! Actual diamonds! Oh do you not have sacks of diamonds GOOD LUCK FINDING A HOUSE

Posted in I hate money, a lot, how interesting, i am a grown up, where i want to live, whining | No Comments »

assistance

June 5th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

I’m thrilled to announce that a very lovely college student who I met at the Ojai Playwright’s Conference is going to be my assistant for the Summer. I think it’ll be an interesting experiment in delegation and letting go. I’ve never had an assistant, so in an effort to understand how this lovely person might be of assistance to me, how I might use her in a way that is rewarding to the both of us, I’ve started a list of tasks.

- organize file cabinet

- figure out why my computer no longer knows that it has a USB port

- find articles and books for me to adapt

- help me get this piece of lettuce out of my teeth

- take my hands to get a manicure

- nurture my drifting friendships

- figure out why my eyes are rejecting my contact lenses

- determine to what extent climate change can be slowed by our behavior

- be my hands

- be my eyes

Posted in I write for television?, YAY, a lot, whining, working, worrying | No Comments »

nonpost

June 1st, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

I do not engage in mindless and narcissistic social pacts such as ‘Throwback Thursday,’ but here is a picture of myself that just so happens to be from the past clearly posing in front of a house that is actually made of mirrors so that it might reflect my own self back to me 100 times.

Posted in YAY, narcissism, vacay's, whining, women | No Comments »

EYE’M MAD

May 25th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

DEAR WOMEN WHO CAN SEE:

DON’T WEAR GLASSES THAT YOU DON’T ACTUALLY NEED TO SEE JUST BECAUSE THEY LOOK COOL. IT IS INSULTING TO PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY NEED GLASSES, LIKE TO SEE, WHICH IS THE POINT OF GLASSES. IT’S LIKE DECIDING TO ROCK A WHEELCHAIR EVEN THOUGH YOU DON’T NEED IT TO WALK JUST BECAUSE IT MATCHES YOUR NEW FUN HIGH TOPS. VISUAL IMPAIRMENT IS AN ACTUAL THING.

SINCERELY,

OTHERWISE COMPLETELY ABLE BODIED PERSON WITH BAD EYES

Posted in what I'm wearing, what i am NOT wearing, whining, women, words | No Comments »

two birds / one drive

May 23rd, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

Sometimes my impulse to multi-task borders on completely insane. Case in point, this morning, while driving to work, instead of putting on music or the news I decided to just drive in silence so as to not add to the noise in my head. And then I thought, oh, is this meditative? And then I thought, oh, maybe instead of finding time to meditate in the day because like who even has time for that, I could do so while driving to work. And then I realized  one should not meditate while driving, because one is driving, and is engaged in things like seeing, and also DRIVING.

Posted in a lot, generally, ha, whining, worrying | No Comments »

TOO MUCH

May 9th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

I think this email I just received is a perfect example of exactly what is wrong with the (my) world right now.

WHY DO I NEED TO WORRY ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT I’M SHOWERING AT THE RIGHT TIME?! AND WOULD IT REALLY ACTUALLY BE THAT BIG OF A DEAL IF I HAPPENED TO BE SHOWERING AT THE WRONG TIME? WHY SHOULD I EVEN WORRY ABOUT THIS? WHY DID I SIGN UP FOR AN EMAIL THING THAT JUST NEEDLES INTO MY SAFE PLACE WITH ABSURD QUESTIONS? AND WHY CAN’T I BRING MYSELF TO UNSUBSCRIBE FROM IT THUS FREEING MYSELF FROM ITS CLAWS? AND ARE THESE EMAILS ACTUALLY THE REASON BEHIND MY INCURABLE DISEASE IN WHICH I TYPE IN ALL CAPS MOST OF THE TIME?

Posted in a lot, whining, worrying | No Comments »

why I need a uniform

May 5th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

Sometimes, or, if I’m being honest, ALL OF THE TIME, I spend more time than I should thinking about what I should wear to a thing. I place a lot of value on outside appearances and neglect the interior. It trickles down even to my idea of what clean is. If a kitchen LOOKS clean, it is clean. No dishes in the sink but like quiet, secret pools of old chicken juice pushed under the dishwasher. A while back, I found this letter in a box of things at my parents’ house. I wrote it to Seventeen Magazine when I was 13 or so, for a ‘tell us why you need a Makeover’ type contest.

It is so sad and horrifying that I guess it’s also a little bit funny, but I keep it a picture of it saved on my desktop to remind myself that there’s some part of me that, for whatever reason, was trapped in this shallow loop at a young age, and that now I am an adult, and I can step out of this loop and just be a person who just wears the same thing every day, a uniform over her thoughts.

Posted in ....ew, a lot, silly, vices, wanting, what I'm wearing, what i am NOT wearing, whining, women | No Comments »

the rewrite

April 15th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

I’m in the middle of re-working a movie I wrote a few years ago. Rewriting pulls out the lose threads of my brain and makes everything, my Face, my Self, the World, feel unstable and wrong. WERE I TO SELECT AN IMAGE, IT IN FACT LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE THIS:

Imagine each piece of yarn is either a character or moment or my own self-loathing and doubt or a TIGHT FRENCH BRAID OF ALL OF IT. The goal, of course, after a certain amount of wading through and tripping over and choking on the mess, is this:

And then naturally, this.

Posted in YAY, a lot, silly, sucking, tout, trying too hard, whining, words | No Comments »

I spy with my little sty

April 14th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

So for weeks there’s been weird stuff going on with my left eye that has finally morphed into a sty monster of sorts.  And for all of these weeks, I have been pretty much completely ignoring the accumulating symptoms, other than occasionally noting them to Morrison. Instead I have been worrying and obsessing about much grander things.  I am so consumed by thoughts about large things that are basically out of my control that I neglect to notice something happening right in front of me, or rather,  on my face. I’m using my eyes to take in data that I turn into worry and stress and I don’t even stop for a moment to take stock of the faulty equipment. I’m sure that Buddha or Gwyneth Paltrow has some fine reflective phrase about this. Probably something like: take care of your physical self so that you’re able to face (or even SEE) the storms ahead of you, imagined or otherwise.

Posted in ....ew, things that I Have, tout, whining | No Comments »

Juice for Dayz

March 27th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

I am embarking on a three day Juice Cleanse because why not, because clearing out the pipes before my body battles the attitude in Peru.  I can’t decide what’s most upsetting about this juice cleanse: that I’m now a person who thinks to do this, that I’m a person who applies the word ‘embark’ to ‘juice cleanse,’ how much I paid for it, or the fact that I’m only going to drink juice and juice only for three god-given days. I’m guessing it’s a combination of all three upsetting things combined into one brownish elixir of health and self satisfaction. MAYBE I’LL DRINK THAT, TOO.

Posted in YAY, a lot, ha, hmmmmm, how interesting, i am lucky, life, oh nooo, whining | No Comments »

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