bekah brunstetter
Bekah Brunstetter I care deeply. About a lot of things. Like really, really deep. Ow
playwright in brooklyn, NY

The real cupcake wars 

June 13th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

If you want to witness one of the great tragicomedies of American culture, just visit any sort of office on any of its workers’ birthdays. On this loathed and sacred day, someone nice brings cupcakes, everyone sort of awkwardly sings, and then everyone sits around pretending like they’re not going to eat the cupcakes and talking about how they’re not going to eat the cupcakes, and then either giving in and eating them or staring at them hatefully while others eat them or shoving gum into their mouths so as to not eat them, or sometimes even — eating them proudly and with abandon. My co-worker Vera and I have birthdays two days apart, and because we are deeply aware of the feelings of our co-workers, we combined our cupcakes days into one. Perhaps every office should select one day of the year and just call it Birthday, and every person in the office can face-dive into vats of butter cream then take a group nap, as opposed to spreading the self restraint / gluttony bit by bit over the calendar.

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June 11th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

Okay y’all. I am just as into the toddler chic vibe as the next girl. But this ad on Instagram now officially crosses all of the lines 


THIS IS CLOTHING FOR AN ACTUAL BABY BUT FOR AN ADULT. YOU COULD LITERALLY POOP YOURSELF IN THIS. Can we agree to maintain SOME dignity while also wearing Leggings with cupcakes on them? Like pair them with at least a grown up top? 

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Corporate sponsorship 

May 22nd, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

HUGE NEWS, WORLD! The world premiere of my play the Cake is sponsored in part by Cheerwine, by which I mean someone from the Echo theater had  to drive to someplace like Redondo Beach or something to a beverage shipping center of some kind to pick up these donated cases of nostalgic nectar. Audiences members from all over LA county will get to ask WAIT WHAT’S CHEERWINE and then discover that it’s the actual drink feeling of riding your bike home from the pool barefoot before the thunderstorm gets in. Also you can put whiskey in it.  

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You’ve outdone yourself 

May 21st, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

One of my favorite things about hanging out with Julien, other than hanging out with Julien, is the fact that she is the only person that I know who is even more psychotically fixated on time management and doing secret surprise things for others than myself. Being around her normalizes me and it makes it seem like EVERYONE is constantly in their head calculating when we should leave and or how to surprise someone with their favorite thing. I get to sit back and be the receiver instead of the doer, like this casual parfait that she carefully constructed this morning, one for everyone, after waking up at seven to clean and slice fruits and frenetically pack things and just be wonderful, just in general. 

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Three girls / one height 

May 19th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

I somehow managed to make myself three wonderous friends who are all the EXACT. SAME. HEIGHT. Convenient for pictures, ADORABLE FOREVER. 

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perks of being a Foster Keddie

May 15th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

I somehow lucked out and managed to marry into a family with some serious perks. Morrison’s family owns and operates the Boston Harbor Marina up in Olympia,  Washington. It’s part gift shop, part grocery store, part local hang out,  with kayaks, live music, Sunday Brunch, local beers and free unlimited chill vibes. When we visit,  I get to roll into the quaint store like a Kennedy and help myself to the soft serve machine, and then look at the very kind 15 year old working the cash register and say with perhaps too much confidence,  Put this on Cam’s Tab, sweetheart, sometimes with a bonus creepy wink. I’ve also gotten to help out a few times, which honestly brings me more happiness than a bucket of soft serve ever could. It makes me feel part of the family, and with a family spot like this, HOW COULD ONE NOT WANT TO BE ON TEAM FK?

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May 13th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

A massive sea creature that is maybe a squid or a whale or some new sort of thing just washed ashore in Indonesia. Among  questions like WHAT and WHY, I am pondering this: isn’t it crazy that some creatures on earth look like this:

and others, this?

And then even others, this?

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May 7th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

It’s been ten, count ‘em, TEN YEARS since I finished grad school at the New School for Drama with these beautiful people (and also some other ones who couldn’t make it to the reunion, for various life reasons mostly related to babies.) I can say with confidence that we all look exactly the same despite the occasional haircut, and in fact most of us are still wearing the same clothes, confirming my theory that you are basically the same person from when you are 25 until 70 so seriously, just accept that, but also maybe get yourself a new pair of pants BUT ONLY IF THE PREVIOUS PAIR HAS DISINTEGRATED. 

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Full circle, baby

May 6th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

For years After grad school, I worked as the ‘customer service specialist’ for a corporate housing company (which, I should note, I was NOT GREAT AT but it did provide me with dear friends and also material.) Cut to 10 years later, I’m back in NYC for my ten year grad school reunion, and said friends put me up in one of the corporate apartments I used to get paid to fret over and it is truly a dream. IF THAT’S NOT FULL CIRCLE I REALLY DON’T KNOW WHAT IS THO LETS BE REAL ITS MORE LIKE A SERIES OF HAPHAZARD FIGURE EIGHTS

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Road trip gamez 

April 30th, 2017 by Bekah Brunstetter

We’ve had two six hour drives up to Carmel and back this weekend for the wedding (sidenote: WORTH EVERY SECOND) and so we’ve had to amuse ourselves with Bugles, racy rap music, impolite conversation and reboots of car games from our youth. The absolutely best car game thus far comes from Brother John keddie. Basically every time you see an RV, you put Anal in front of its name, and end up with classics like ‘Anal Prism’ and ‘Anal cougar’ and my personal favorite, ‘Anal Leprechaun.’ Once the words are said out loud, the players then laugh like children for a good 20 seconds then settle into a comfortable silence in which they remember that they are adults. Sharing this game here, and I quote Morrison, for ‘posteriority.’ 

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